{"id":649,"date":"2018-05-29T10:36:29","date_gmt":"2018-05-29T08:36:29","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/juliettepotin.com\/?p=649"},"modified":"2023-11-15T14:19:51","modified_gmt":"2023-11-15T13:19:51","slug":"je-me-sens-fragile-comment-ne-pas-sombrer-dans-la-depression-en-expat","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/juliettepotin.com\/index.php\/2018\/05\/29\/je-me-sens-fragile-comment-ne-pas-sombrer-dans-la-depression-en-expat\/","title":{"rendered":"Je me sens fragile"},"content":{"rendered":"

Je vous ai d\u00e9j\u00e0 racont\u00e9 le jour ou j\u2019ai emmen\u00e9 mes enfants \u00e0 l\u2019\u00e9cole en pyjama… et o\u00f9 je me suis recouch\u00e9e apr\u00e8s ?\u00a0<\/span>J\u2019ai toujours eu une bonne r\u00e9sistance au stress. J\u2019avais un poste \u00e0 responsabilit\u00e9 dans l\u2019industrie, une \u00e9quipe de 20 bonhommes. J\u2019ai men\u00e9 des entretiens de recrutement et des entretiens de recadrage. J\u2019ai subi du harc\u00e8lement moral, des clients tyranniques, des semaines de d\u00e9placements \u00e9puisantes et pourtant, je n\u2019ai jamais flanch\u00e9\u00a0!<\/span> Et puis, un jour, en expatriation, j’ai r\u00e9alis\u00e9 que je me sentais extr\u00eamement fragile. J’ai r\u00e9alis\u00e9 que cette carapace que je croyais avoir \u00e9tait compl\u00e8tement fissur\u00e9e.<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Effectivement, j\u2019avais les larmes aux yeux face \u00e0 la standardiste de l\u2019\u00e9cole des enfants me demandant comment je trouvais le pays… Je piquais un fard devant l\u2019h\u00f4tesse de caisse du supermarch\u00e9 ne comprenant pas sa question apr\u00e8s lui avoir fait r\u00e9p\u00e9ter 3 fois. Et je fondais en larmes le soir dans le canap\u00e9, devant mon mari m\u00e9dus\u00e9 et bien emb\u00eat\u00e9. Qu\u2019est ce qui s\u2019\u00e9tait pass\u00e9\u00a0? <\/span><\/p>\n

Pour moi cela n’avais aucune explication rationnelle. J\u2019\u00e9tais sinc\u00e8rement heureuse. J\u2019avais choisi cette expatriation et j\u2019avais choisi de ne pas travailler pour profiter des enfants et faciliter l\u2019adaptation de toute la famille. <\/span><\/p>\n

Mais je me sentais vide. Loin de mes anciens coll\u00e8gues, amis, famille pour me renvoyer l\u2019image de la femme forte que j\u2019\u00e9tais, je me sentais nulle et inutile. Et puis j’avais honte d’\u00eatre si fragile. Je ne me reconnaissais plus. Je ne savais plus tr\u00e8s bien qui j\u2019\u00e9tais d\u2019ailleurs.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Voici ce qui m\u2019a aid\u00e9\u00a0:<\/span><\/p>\n

Accepter l\u2019id\u00e9e que je ne vais pas bien.\u00a0<\/strong><\/span><\/h4>\n

C\u2019est le plus difficile \u00e0 admettre. Quand j\u2019ai avou\u00e9 \u00e0 une maman de l\u2019\u00e9cole que j\u2019avais envie de me recoucher le matin une fois les enfants partis. Elle m\u2019a dit\u00a0: \u00ab\u00a0tu d\u00e9primes\u00a0\u00bb. J\u2019ai dit\u00a0: \u00ab\u00a0mais non, pas du tout, tout va bien, j\u2019ai connu pire\u00a0\u00bb mais \u00e7a sonnait faux. Accepter l\u2019id\u00e9e qu\u2019on ne va pas bien m\u00eame si on culpabilise \u00e0 l\u2019\u00e9vocation de cette m\u00eame id\u00e9e, c\u2019est le premier pas pour s\u2019en sortir. Parce que si on l\u2019admet, on peut envisager des solutions.<\/span><\/p>\n

Mettre dans mes journ\u00e9es des choses qui me donnent de l’\u00e9nergie.<\/strong>\u00a0<\/span><\/h4>\n

Cela n\u2019a pas du tout \u00e9t\u00e9 \u00e9vident pour moi au d\u00e9part parce que \u00e7a faisait bien longtemps que je ne m\u2019\u00e9tais pas pos\u00e9 la question de ce qui me faisait du bien et ce qui me donnait de l\u2019\u00e9nergie. Mais petit \u00e0 petit, j\u2019ai trouv\u00e9\u00a0: organiser des d\u00e9jeuners avec des personnes que j’avais envie de mieux conna\u00eetre, aller marcher sur l\u2019Appalachian Trail, rendre service \u00e0 l\u2019\u00e9cole, suivre des cours de civilisation am\u00e9ricaine\u2026<\/span><\/p>\n

Comprendre ce qui se passe et que c\u2019est une \u00e9tape.\u00a0<\/strong><\/span><\/h4>\n

Se renseigner sur la courbe du choc culturel \/ deuil de sa vie<\/a> d’avant. Parce qu\u2019en fait, on passe tous par l\u00e0! et on se sent moins honteux quand on comprend que c\u2019est normal et presqu\u2019un passage oblig\u00e9.<\/span><\/p>\n

Me faire aider.\u00a0<\/strong><\/span><\/h4>\n

Ce qui m\u2019a sauv\u00e9 c\u2019est de pouvoir \u00e9changer avec mon amie su\u00e9doise qui vivait la m\u00eame chose que moi, qui avait elle aussi quitt\u00e9 son statut de femme active pour suivre son mari et ne vivait pas super bien de se retrouver \u00e0 la maison. Pas toujours \u00e9vident de se confier \u00e0 nos amis ou famille rest\u00e9s en France. Ils ne comprennent pas ce qu\u2019on traverse et tentent de nous faire voir le bon c\u00f4t\u00e9 des choses, nous renvoyant alors \u00e0 notre culpabilit\u00e9. Si vous n\u2019avez pas d\u2019amie \u00e0 qui vous confier sur place, n\u2019h\u00e9sitez pas \u00e0 faire appel \u00e0 un psychologue ou un coach<\/a>.<\/span><\/p>\n

Apprendre \u00e0 accueillir mes \u00e9motions<\/a>.\u00a0<\/strong><\/span><\/h4>\n

Je savais d\u00e9j\u00e0 avant de partir que j\u2019\u00e9tais une grande sensible<\/a>. Je crois que l\u2019expatriation a mis \u00e0 nu la fragilit\u00e9 que j\u2019avais si bien r\u00e9ussi \u00e0 camoufler jusque-l\u00e0. Ce fut l\u2019opportunit\u00e9 de commencer un travail sur moi, pour accepter ces \u00e9motions envahissantes et en faire des alli\u00e9es et non des ennemis.<\/span><\/p>\n

Et vous, vous sentez vous plus fragile en ce moment ?<\/span><\/p>\n\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Je vous ai d\u00e9j\u00e0 racont\u00e9 le jour ou j\u2019ai emmen\u00e9 mes enfants \u00e0 l\u2019\u00e9cole en pyjama… et o\u00f9 je me suis recouch\u00e9e apr\u00e8s ?\u00a0J\u2019ai toujours eu une bonne r\u00e9sistance au […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":650,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_exactmetrics_skip_tracking":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_active":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_note":"","_exactmetrics_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[33,63],"tags":[9,14,55,13,18,60,56],"class_list":["post-649","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-expat","category-trouver-ma-voie","tag-choc-culturel","tag-deprime","tag-emotions","tag-expat","tag-fragile","tag-pensees","tag-serenite"],"yoast_head":"\nJe me sens fragile - Expat coach - Trouver ma voie<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Et puis, un jour, en expatriation, j'ai r\u00e9alis\u00e9 que je me sentais extr\u00eamement fragile. 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